Scene 14
[Street corner. Bruce is wearing a grey three piece suit and black
leather shoes. he has shaved his goatee. He lights a cigarette with a brass
Zippo. Sun breaks through the clouds, and he puts on a pair of sunglasses.
Simon appears beside him. He is dressed in blue jeans a heavy cotton
jersey, and a black field jacket, and sunglasses]
Bruce: Let's walk.
Simon: Are you sure it's Maureen Agincourte?
Bruce: I went to the ATF lab this morning, she used a homemade detonator.
Had the same twists in the tie offs that Mike D'Antoino tried to break her
of during her explosives training.
Simon: I'm glad you have a memory for that shit. Okay it's her, and somehow
she survived two bullets to the head and the Atlantic ocean.
Bruce: Two bullets to the FACE, not the head...no kill shot.
Simon: Whatever, what now?
Bruce: She doesn't know about the three blind mice we sent to Monolith, or
we would be dead already. She asked me out the other day. She's trying to
get in close.
Simon: Why not just finish the job now. She's probably in her office buried
in out processing paperwork.
Bruce: We can't do this in the open.
Simon: You aren't changing your mind about the Moira Celeste decision are you?
Bruce: No, they were traitors, mercenary terrorists would be too kind...I
seem to remember saying something about all enemies foreign and domestic at
one point.
Simon: Me too, I also remember the operations group motto, do unto others-
Bruce- before they do unto you.
Simon: What do you have in mind?
Bruce: I want to know how much she knows, and what she knows about Monolith
infiltration of the government.
Simon: you have a plan?
Bruce: I'm going to let her get close.
Simon: That's a plan? She'll torture and kill you after she finds out what
she needs.
Bruce: I didn't say close to me. It will give you an opportunity to correct
your mistake.
Simon: I shot her in the face twice, and left her to drown in the
Atlantic, AFTER trapping 17 highly trained operatives in a single chamber
on a ship, and I made a mistake....you ARE an administrator.
Bruce: exactly...and you're not. I'll be watching your back.
Simon: You haven't gotten me killed yet, if you do I'll be pissed.
Bruce: while we're at it, I'm retiring.
Simon: Sure you are.
Bruce: I am.
Simon: Bruce you're a twisted fuck who can't go a day without manipulating
people. What are you going to do, teach? Are you bailing out of the
Underground completely?
Bruce: Dave is going to take my place.
Simon: Does he know this?
Bruce: not yet, I'm not sure how much I should let him know.
Simon: Vivienne will teach him anything he needs to know about the reality
Underground.
Bruce: He isn't comfortable with the hit on Magnus, I can tell.
Simon: Ask him if he's comfortable with the Oklahoma city bombing, and then
let him know what a bunch of evil motherfuckers Monoilth are.
Bruce: point
Simon: he'll find his way, or not, it's up to him, don't be everyone's mom.
Bruce: You coming to the party tonight?
Simon: no my boss wants me to make plans for the weekend I think.
Bruce: Must be a real asshole, would it make it any easier if he bought you
lunch at Maison Robert?
Simon: I hate French classical cuisine...make it Clio's.
Bruce: i'm glad one of us is dressed.
[Cut to the Remora group. Long aerial shot of the BasicallyGUI! group.
Dave's head pops out of a cube in the distance. Cut to his point of view.
He holds a walkie talkie.]
Dave: Tigger, this is Christopher Robbin, Team 1 is a go.
Greg: Recevied Christopher Robbin.
[All of the technicians emerge from their cubes, at the same time. They
are pushing chairs piled with computer equipment, software boxes, and CD
cases. They fall into a single line and move quickly towards the door. Cut
to Greg outside, he holds flags directing people to the left or the right.
The technicians pile equipment in the back of different rental trucks.]
Greg: Christopher Robbin, we need about another half hour to get all of the
honey out of the Hundred Acre wood, will Kanga be able to distract the bees?
Dave: She's in hive as we speak.
[Cut to Vivienne in a supermini and tight halter top, sitting cross legged
in a chair in the security office talking to a young guard. Cut back to Dave]
Dave: We have about 15 jars left on the inside, whats it looking like out
there?
Greg: Empty jars on their way back in.
[Techs begin to file back into the building with their chairs and return
to their cubes. Everyone settles back in. The Rental trucks pull away.
Steve emerges from his office. He walks over to Dave's cube]
Steve: You know... people aren't even moving today, never mind taking phone
calls. I have approval to fire anyone I feel like it on the spot... if the
attitude doesn't improve around here, I'll do just that.
Dave: ummmm, Steve, does it occur to you that no one cares? They have
already been fired. Most of these guys are coming to work for something to
break up the day, the rest actually look at being here as an obstruction to
their job search...by the way, how's your job search going?
Steve: We aren't talking about me Dave! Get these people back on the phone.
[Steve walks back to his office, oblivious to the lack of computer
equipment. Inside his office he sits down, and looks over the general help
wanted section of the newpaper, he starts circling dishwashing jobs. Bruce
appears in a suit at Dave's cube]
Dave: interview?
Bruce: Funeral.
Dave: really?
Bruce: No...I just got here, i haven't even been to my cube yet, will there
be any computer equipment in it when I get there?
Dave: Probably...noone wants to go near it, someone started yelling at them
to get back on the phone.
Bruce: Oh no...okay, listen, I'll be back at the apartment around 5, make
sure everyone gets directions.
Dave: Already done.
Bruce: Excellent. I'll see you later man.
[Cut to Bruce at his cube. He looks in at the evil bunny which is
chattering away with Dan's voice]
Dan: people really need to get back on the phone, and i mean now, how are
we going to maintain quality like this-
Bruce: Dan the contract has been cancelled...you need to start looking for
a new job...
Dan: I don't want to a new job. I like this one.
Bruce: Can I talk to Tony?
Dan: Well he is on lunch, I suppose...
[The Bunny shakes, and Tony's voice comes out of it]
Tony: Bruce, he's a maniac, he doesn't even know he's dead...did you say
the contract is over?
Bruce: yeah...listen Tony, this has gone on long enough, why don't you tell
me how you died, and get out of here, I have a feeling thats what's keeping
you here...
Tony: it's kind of embarrassing Dave...
Bruce: Damnit Tony, I don't have the time for this, you want to be stuck
here with Dave for the rest of eternity?
Tony: Okay, I choked on a pistachio nut...
Bruce: I know that, how did it happen...
Tony: Well...I was kind of seeing Janet....
Bruce: and it was a big secret I know....
Tony: You knew? Well, I was sitting at my desk one day and she had sent me
mail...
Bruce: and....
Tony: well I had just swallowed a bunch of pistachio's and I opened the
attachment, she had sent me pictures of herself.
Bruce: So?
Tony: they were naughty.
Bruce: naughty?
Tony: naughty.
Bruce: You trapped yourself here indefinitely because you were embarrased
about the fact that Janet sent you "naughty" pictures of herself.
Tony: Well, more like I was so shocked at them, I just choked....wow I do
feel better...I didn't want Dan to know about it because I'm kind of stuck
in here with him...and telling you guys, and well...I was just ripped out
of my body so fast...
Bruce: This would explain why your hard drive still makes noises for no
apparent reason.
Tony: well...yeah...can I go now?
Bruce: get out of here, I'll take care of Dan.
[Bruce takes his cell phone out of his suit coat pocket]
Bruce: yeah, Dru? I need you over here before work is out, with 12 of your
best friends if you know what I mean... yeah it is, and I know it wasn't
approved...I need to get some paperwork from you to take care of
that.....no the Evil bunny is leaving the building...I have a special phone
reset request...
[Cut to Steve, he walks through the aisles, each technician he sees is on
the phone talking...but they have no computer equipment. he walks over to
Dave's cube]
Steve: Dave! Where's everone's equipment??
Dave: Oh you didn't know, corporate level sent a bunch of trucks over this
afternoon to remove it all...doesn't make it too easy for us to do out job
Steve... didn't you tell them this would be a bad idea?
Steve: Um?
Dave: if we want to maintain quality for the next week, it's going to be
pretty hard without machines, then again, I can see why you wouldn't
complain...not a good idea right now.
Steve: Well...you know how it is, I just want everyone to do their
best...by the way, where are all the guys from VoidStarZ?
Dave: They all have new jobs, they were out of here about 2 hours ago.
Steve: oh....
[Steve wanders off in a haze to his office. His desk is piled high with
classifed ads. he has an army recruitment brochoure on top of the pile. Cut
to Bruce's cube...13 people in bright orange robes are filing down the
aisle...Drusilla stands in front of Bruce with a clip board dressed in the
same color robe. She hands the clipboard to Bruce. he uncaps a pen with his
teeth, and signs 17 forms in a row. he hands the clipboard back to her. She
hands him a phone]
Bruce: Thanks Dru...
Dru: Are you sure it's a good idea to messing with the forces of the
netherworld like this without any regard for the consequences?
Bruce: No, I'm not sure, which is why I called professionals.
Dru: Good plan...what are you going to do with that phone anyway?
Bruce: Can't tell you...don't worry, you won't have to support it.
Dru: That's all I was really worried about.
Bruce: Well, it's time to go home, you guys coming to my party tonight?
Dru: probably, you going to have food?
Bruce: and a lot of it
Dru: beer?
Bruce: yeah
Dru: we'll be there, see you later then
[Cut to Dave's cube, he's trying to stuff as many Monolith CD's as he can
into a gym bag, Vivienne and Greg appear.]
Greg: The cafeteria is back in the right place...again.
Dave: I stopped paying attention. You guys want to get out of here? Bruce
just left.
Vivienne: Yes. I need to get out of this skirt NOW. If one more guy asks me to
lean over and get something for them, I am going to shoot them.
Dave: You're carrying a gun?
Greg: She is.
Vivienne: David. Do not. I repeat do NOT ask where.
[Cut to Diane. She's cleaning her guns]
[Cut to Magnus Reece. He's playing Solitaire]
[Cut to Charlie. He's hang gliding off the coast in Chile]
[Cut to Bruce's apartment, Karen steps off the lift. The apartment is
otherwise empty of people. There is a large buffet table in front of the
windows that look out onto the skyline. The Sister's of Mercy blare from
the speakers so loudly Bruce doesn't even hear her come in. He is crushing
garlic, and mixing it in with a large bowl of hummus. She taps him on the
shoulder. In a flash he has her pinned down on the counter with a paring
knife to her throat. When he sees it's her he immediately draws the knife
away and reaches for the remote to the stereo. He shuts it off]
Bruce: I am SO sorry.
Karen: jumpy aren't we?
Bruce: Very...
Karen: good thing you don't carry a gun.
Bruce: never have, just a knife...self defense and a kitchen untensil all
wrapped into one.
Karen: so when is everyone getting here.
Bruce: Around 8, Vivienne, Dave, and Greg will be here soon, which reminds me.
[Bruce walks over to the office section of his apartment and comes back
with a small black box. He hands it to her and starts to crush garlic again]
Karen: What is this?
Bruce: It's a three karat diamond, princess cut, flawless. The ring is
platinum.
[Karen stares at him.]
Karen: And?
Bruce: Oh you need to wear it tonight, you just got engaged to some guy who
is out of town.
Karen: and how did that happen?
Bruce: I needed to lie to Vivienne about my reasons for getting together
with Simon, she had already pretty much figured out who you were, so I said
we had to go shopping for a wedding gift.
Karen: You are an asshole.
[Bruce looks over, confused.]
Bruce: what's wrong?
Karen: for all of your analytical capability, and manipulative skill, you
are still just a guy Bruce.
Bruce: What did I do? I need you to cover for me... did you want to be
single this evening?
Karen: Of all the dirty tricks Casey, I can't believe you would do
something like this, I haven't had the time to go on a date for 4 months
and then you decide to do this. I don't think you even KNOW when you're
being manipulative anymore!! On top of that-
[the lift opens Karen, Greg and Vivienne stand there]
Karen: if you think I'm going to approve that much money for such a hair
brained scheme you are out of your mind!!!!
Dave: bad time?
Bruce and
Karen: NO.
Vivienne: umhmmm
Greg: This is a good time to go get a beer...
Vivienne: Hello Karen, we haven't been formerly introduced although I know
we've talked before.
Karen: Bruce told me you had figured out who I was thanks to Simon...nice
to meet you in person...
Dave: I'm Dave...so you're in charge of the underground?
Karen: I'm the administrator...I was just giving Bruce a piece of my mind..
Vivienne: Good, someone needs to give him a kick in the head.
Bruce: I'm going to go take a shower and change....
Karen and Vivienne: Good
Dave: um Bruce...is there anything I can do?
Bruce: Hide...kind of tough with no walls but try your best...the walk in
is pretty big.
[Bruce heads for the shower]
[Cut to shower. Bruce's cell phone rings. He shuts the water off and dries
a hand. he answers]
Bruce: yeah?
Simon: the mice still haven't gone for the cheese.
Bruce: hopefully we can force the issue, I forgot to tell you the Hotchoc
is active...
Simon: Then there shouldn't be a problem.
Bruce: You're just saying that becuase it was modelled on your personality.
Simon: Don't tell Vivienne, it would creep her out.
Bruce: Anything else?
Simon: I'm ready when you are, no sign of the bitch yet.
Bruce: Same here, the party is about to get going. I'll call you if
anything comes up.
Simon: later
[Bruce steps out of the shower and dries off]
Bruce: if of course I survive the evening
[Friday: 2000 hrs. Bruce's apartment. Roughly 150 people are milling about
drinking eating and talking. Several people have lemon reamers around their
neck.]
Tech1: we have about 70,000 dollars worth of their software
Tech2: and most of their shitty computers
[Pan to Dave and Vivienne standing near the window. Vivienne is dressed in
jeans and a sweatshirt, and keds]
Dave: So what are you planning on doing when all of this is over, do you
have somewhere to go back to?
Vivienne: Next assignment. Looks pretty tough.
Dave: What is it.
Vivienne: Training thing. I talked to Karen about it earlier. Could take a
while, years even.
Dave: really....is it far away?
Vivienne: All depends, kind of an on the job thing you know?
[Vivienne takes a drink of her Guiness]
Dave: Where did you learn to drink that stuff?
Vivienne: It's mothers milk where I come from.
[She smiles]
Dave: i always thought of Guiness as Irish.
Vivienne: I am, kind of...Northern Ireland...where we stayed when we weren't
travelling, my sister and I lived with the circus...then my sister got
involved with the wrong crowd...something happened to her then. I left for
school. Haven't seen her since. I have no idea what happened to her.
Dave: Wow, that's too bad.... how did you get into the Underground anyway.
Vivienne: Like I said Bruce recruited me.
Dave: Just like that?
Vivienne: He helped me out of an embarrasing situation with a guy I was dating.
Claimed to be a Stolichnaya representative.
Dave: he wasn't?
Vivienne: No he was ex-KGB freelancing for Monolith.
Dave: ahhhhh
Vivienne: So what are you going to do?
Dave: I'd like to continue this Underground thing... I had an absolute
blast today...most fun I think I have EVER had.
Vivienne: good, there's a long long training period you know.
Dave: really?
Vivienne: excruciating...and you're with your instructor most of the time.
Dave: who would be my instructor
Vivienne: me
Dave: i think I could deal with that...
[They smile at each other]
Dave: hey, do you like cats?
[Cut to Greg, surrounded by three different girls]
Greg: And then well, I got them out of the burning wreck and to safety...it
was close though.
Girl: wow
[Cut to Bruce and Karen]
Karen: not much of a mingler are you?
[Bruce is tapping another keg]
Bruce: Not in the mood.
Karen: What's your problem?
Bruce: I'm still trying to figure out why you're so upset.
Karen: My God you are stupid.
Bruce: Thanks.
[He pumps the keg]
Karen: how long have we known each other?
Bruce: 16 years.
Karen: long time
Bruce: Your point?
Karen: jesus, you are impossible.
Bruce: I guess I am.
Karen: I'm not taking this ring off.
Bruce: keep it.
Karen: I am.
Bruce: cash it in for a trip...somewhere far away.
Karen: You gave it to me. I'm keeping it. Figure it out.
[Karen walks off into the crowd. Greg stands next to the keg and pours
himself a beer]
Greg: I thought she was engaged?
Bruce: what?
Greg: engaged, you said she was engaged.
Bruce: yeah
Greg: I was just going to say, it's kind of hard to figure out who she's
engaged to
[Bruce looks at Greg with a blank look on his face, and then his
expression changes radically]
Bruce: Oh shit.
Greg: you want me to grab another keg?
Bruce: for what?
Greg: For you.
[Cut to a dusty sub basement. The HotChoc9000 sits on a table, beeping and
grinding, spitting out hot chocolate randomly. It's display is bright
yellow. The word "CONFIGURING" flashes over and over again]
[Cut to Looie. he loads his gun, and unloads it, again, and again.]
Looie: pink or red. Pink or red.
[Looie can't decide between Nerf darts]
[Cut to patty O'Furniture and Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. She looks at a
menu, they lean over, she then gives her order to the waitress]